As the lover boy that I am, and as someone who has been in a relationship for 7 years, I suppose that might qualify me as an expert on relationships and romance, and make me qualified to give advice on how to get more out of your relationship/romance in your life. When I shared this with my girlfriend she laughed, and I created a romantic scene there in my relationship by throwing a pillow at her. 😁😁
These are 5 ways to get a romantic partner in 2022. (Please note that this is by no means an exhaustive list. 😉)
1. The ‘You’ll find love when you’re not looking’ approach may be wrong.
That’s like saying, “You’ll find a job when you’re least looking for it”, it’s possible, but rarely happens.
For me, it’s just an excuse for being scared to go and put the effort in. Yes, it happens, but no, it’s not a good strategy.
Don’t be desperate. Put the effort in to find someone, but don’t act like any breathing body will do.
2. Go where people like the same things you like.
You can skip singles events if you don’t like them, but you have to go where you can meet people. Join social groups or meet-ups; be a worker bee in a cause you believe in; get involved in political parties etc. At the very least, you’re doing something you like and at the very best, you’ll meet somebody like-minded.
Try online dating for a big pool of potential candidates. If you’re already online, try a different dating site.
3. Don’t seek romance, seek partnership.
Romance is for dates, and it’s fun to have on occasion in your relationship, but it’s a partnership that will get you through the rough times.
Don’t look for someone who sweeps you off your feet. That one na control freak, and you won’t like what happens later (breakfast served), Look for someone who likes give-and-take, who seeks your opinion and considers it, who cares about what you want.
4. Instant sexual attraction often fades.
Most good love is a slow burn — it takes a while to develop, attraction is important, but you don’t have to feel it right away since that instant spark is more about lust and less about the stuff of real relationships.
Emotion can change and deepen over time so give people a fair shot.
5. Know the difference between fooling around and building a real relationship.
You can mess around with anyone if you’re careful and have safe sex. But before you bring someone into your life, remember they’re bringing their baggage into your life.
The person you’re dating is on their best behaviour in the beginning. It gets worse later, not better, so get to know what’s hidden before going too far.
Whether you’ve been partnered for six months, six years, or over six decades, easy romantic gestures can help cut through the weeds of monotony that can make relationships feel a little less glamorous, chocolates and roses don’t always get the job done in real life.
Making the effort to add more romance isn’t just for people who want to avoid getting stuck in a loveless relationship/marriage (or a sexless marriage); every couple can benefit, no matter how content they might be already